John Hellum January 2010

John Hellum, Man About Town

Current Article ∙ Archive ∙ Back to Island Voices

 

The Fine Art of Pushcart Cuisine

I crave the type of food sometimes that lurks in the shadows of the food groups. Yes those comestibles that have negligible nutritional value, are terribly unwholesome, but taste so good late at night. They and only they can satisfy that demon craving.

When that demon strikes, you crave something garlicky, salty, spicy and fatty. Sausage fills the bill….but where can I find a sausage late at night? All the restaurants are closed. Then it hits me. Of course. Mr. Tube Steak!

I grabbed my hat and cane and hobbled off into the night to find this finest in pushcart cuisine…that would set my world right and harmonize me with the stars.

As I searched through the streets I mentally experienced the memories of my favorite; Bavarian Smokie with sauerkraut, jalapenos, mustard and barbecue sauce. Like an alley cat I could smell the scent around the corner. The aroma of Smokies grilling away, waiting for the late night crowd from the pub.

There, vending his wares, with the air of a seasoned observer of late night human nature was the same old pushcart and same vendor I had met on my previous attacks of craving.

“Knowles, am I ever glad to see you!”

I ordered quickly, asking for my bun to be toasted…I dislike soft mashmellow-like buns with wieners. While my bun was toasting he carefully selected a Smokie and sliced it diagonally in four places. That treatment was new to me…I asked why. He replied, “So that the fat escapes to baste the sausage while it’s cooking and keeps it straight and flat.”

There is an art to pushcart cuisine.

So, true to my need to research, I questioned Knowles about the other products. We had time to catch up before my smokie was done.

The regular Tube Steak is made from chicken or beef, garlic, thyme, rosemary, onion salt and pepper. The Smokie is made from smoked fatty pork, with the same seasonings. There are actually veggie TS’s as well. And they also make a bacon, cheddar cheese and jalapeño Smokie. I sampled this and found it hits the palate full on, with a delayed reaction in the stomach. With the addition of condiments it’s entirely possible to throw flames out of your mouth.

To proceed with the research, I was informed that the wieners are seven inches for regular and eight and a half the smokies, with the bun being good quality French bread hoagies. The chat was over, time to eat. The sizzling fat beauty was placed before me in my toasted-to-perfection bun, carefully wrapped in paper napkin. It had a bewitching flavour that insidiously hooks you and opens your eyes to that glimpse of life on the wild side.

I watched him serve everything he had cooked. It was 2.15a.m. I wiped my chin, gave a perfunctory burp to show my appreciation, and thanked Knowles for being there once again in my hour of need.

Current Article ∙ Archive ∙ Back to Island Voices

Top